Picture this

Just as I should have been enjoying my morning tea and toast, the guinea hens decided to attack everybody in the chicken yard.   Out I went, with two long poles (the ones that screw onto a roller brush to extend the length) so that I looked like some strange Air Traffic Controller directing the guineas out of the fenced in area, through the gate and into the Free Air.  They promptly ran around the fence looking for a way back in.  Before going back to my breakfast I watched them to see what they would do.  Suddenly I saw a black hen and two chicks outside the fence in the back woods.  Unfortunately the guineas saw them too.  Such a savage attack I have never seen amongst birds!  I ran and got the Pellet Rifle--thinking that Mrs. G would have a much better arsenal than I in a case like this--and started shooting.  I may have hit the broadside of someone's house, but I do not believe I hit any guineas.  I chased the guineas as they chased the hen and chicks.  Running through the woods in jelly clogs, a long underwear shirt and a skimpy jumper, chasing assorted poulty, stopping every bit to reload, pump and shoot.  What a sight I must have been! 

Eventually the guineas headed back home, me shooting at them all the way.  I never did see the hen and chicks.  On my way back through the woods I heard dogs barking and guineas screeching.  "Please eat them,"  I said to myself.  Meaning the dogs should eat the guineas and not the other way.  But no, there they were going through the neighbors back yard.   I started to hear popping and yelling and realized the neighbor had joined in the Pellet Rifle attack.  Unfortunately she was a bad a shot as I and all the guineas made it back home. 

Craig and I checked on all the hens and they were all there.  Which makes me wonder if I was defending someone else's birds?  Seems likely.  I got all riled up and sweaty and full of righteous indignation and all for naught.  Well, maybe not completely naught.  I see now I need to do regular target practice if I ever hope to hit anything.  I see that the Days of the Guinea are numbered.  Mrs. G has converted me to her way of thinking.  I will not worry about the loneliness of my one guinea chick, as she has no idea that she is a guinea.  She's in a flock of chickens and they are bonded and so I will let it be.  Teaches me for thinking like a human and not a chicken.  Chickens don't look around and say "Those chickens don't look like me.  I won't be their friend.  I'll go look for chickens that look like me."  No.  They've risen past Looking at Appearances and found that the important thing is that they live in harmony with their flockmates.  Of course, they have issues with other groups of birds, but that isn't the point.  I'm illustrating here, people, and sometimes it gets a little messy!  I judged by appearance, they judged by bonding.  I have been taught by fowl. 

Humbly yours,

The Adventures of Runty, Guinea Extraordinaire, Part 2

Great Day For......

Today the weather was mild and the wind was blowing quite nicely.  It was the perfect day for: 
A)  Taking a hike in the mountains
B)  Going boating
C)  Working in the garden
D)  Cleaning the Chicken Coops

C'mon.  Do you really have to ask which is the right answer?  There is no better weather for shoveling and scraping a few months worth of straw, wood shavings and broiler poo from the chicken coops.  I happen to like a lightweight snow shovel for this task, with the assistance of a flat nosed shovel (similar to what is often called a 'barn shovel').  If I'm really determined on cleaning it perfectly I will also employ a small broom to sweep cobwebs and perhaps a hose and bucket for deep cleaning.  I have drain holes drilled into the floor, about the size of your thumb, which assist in the nasty task when needed. 

I am happy to say I enjoyed every minute of what is normally a disgusting, sweaty, smelly chore.  But the wind blew the lovely aroma of fecal matter and ammonia right past, it was cool enough that no sweat was produced, and I was in a good mood.  Two heaping giant wheelbarrow loads later the coop was ready for clean shavings.  There are few things more satisfying than spreading out a bed of shavings for your hens.  It smells so fresh and looks inviting.  Even the guineas, notoriously hard to please, were happy and didn't pick on anybody for an hour or more. 

I was able to order some high protein game bird feed from my favorite store---Yes, Carson's!--and look forward to seeing a change for the better in the behavior of my maniac monsters.  We had a wonderful conversation about the relationship between feed and the disposition of poultry.  These are the moments that make life a joyous thing.  Wearing my overalls, standing to the side of the Altar of Seeds, talking about high protein feed on a perfect Saturday afternoon. 

It doesn't get any better than this.

Mystery Solved!

In case you hadn't noticed, I love my guineas.  They crack me up.  But they are mean, mean, mean to my chickens.  And they're not so nice to each other.  I was ready to call up whatever organization awards prizes to patient farmers and nominate Mrs. G:  She had the guineas for far longer than I and yet I was ready to shoot them today. 

It's really bad when you're Googling "Why are guineas so mean to hens?".  Nobody had a word to say on the subject until Search Results Page 3.  There was the Mother Lode of Guinea Information!  It solved all the guinea questions I had and, most important of all, saved the lives of five crazy birds. 

Guineas, so it seems, require a higher protein content in their feed.  If they are not getting it, they will find it.  It may be the feathers of a barnyard companion.  It may be eggs sitting in a nest.  It may be another birds tasty flesh.  I am humble enough to admit that it is My fault that the guineas have been progressively plucking my nerves by plucking the chickens. Tomorrow will include a trip to the feed store for some high protein feed more suited to the needs of my maniacal, um, maniacs. 

On a totally unrelated note, the rabbits all took a train to Brookneal today to live with a wonderful homesteading, homeschooling family with many beautiful, well behaved children. I was privileged to be given a tour of their little farm.  I love seeing the ideas other people have for housing their animals.  Very creative and efficient.  And they just happened to have some goats.  That in no way affects my opinion that these are fabulous people with good taste and great intellect.  Not at all.  Goats should never be used as a measuring stick to judge the worth of people.   I think you also have to consider their chickens and the size of their woodpile as well.  It did concern me a bit that she and her husband consider me a little 'weird but cool'.  I forgave her that, however, as it is a kinder description than the one given by one of my daughter's friends who considered me 'Eccentric'.  Really, where do people get these ideas?  I'm sure I've never done anything to merit such labels. 

Other than a mild fascination with teacups, I'm just the as sane as everyone else.  I swear.  I have a doctor's certificate that says so. 

Jumble

Bucket 'O Chicken

How does this even happen on what is primarily a Chicken Farm?

Guineas got to spend the day on the other side of the fence today.  Until it got dark.  Then they came up on the deck, flew up to the roof and into the garden on the other side of the house.  Now all they need to do is jump that fence to get into the chicken yard.  Considering they ran in circles around the chicken yard fence for 7 hours today, I'm not placing any bets. 

If you could only hear them singing their Crazy Guinea Song....

Things I Would Like to Change

I have a tendency to get really enthused about Projects and then when they don't turn out like I want or thought they would I want to just call it quits.  (Good thing I don't do that with people!  lol!)  That's where I am right now with the rabbits.  I got them for meat purposes for our family.  Turns out family doesn't like rabbit.  Hmm.  I've sold a bunch--meaning an unspecified amount which is below the threshold set by some obscure federal law--for pets or for other people interested in raising meat rabbits.  I butchered some and froze them and every so often a friend fond of rabbit comes by and relieves me of one.  In fact, I just bred the rabbits for his future benefit.

But, I don't want to be in the rabbit business.  I don't want to be in the chicken business.  I just want stuff for our family, greedy little me.  I could stand to sell some eggs now and again, but that's more for the sake of getting rid of the extras.  The bottom line is that I would like to send the rabbits on their merry way with some family who would love them and then eat them or their offspring.  But Ronny seems to like the rabbits.  What to do, what to do?

The Guineas are another thing.  I love them.  Ronny loves them.  The chickens, eh, not so much.  The Little Chickens have become Agoraphobic and refuse to leave the house.  The Middle Chickens spend an inordinate amount of time hiding under the house.  And I've gotten three eggs the last week, a hint that all is not well in Big Chicken Land.  To try to have our cake and eat it too, over dinner we decided to allow the Guineas access to the woods during the day, then they can come home to roost at dusk.  Hopefully this will restore the balance of the barnyard.

I'm craving goats again, BUT I think I know how that story goes.  Should I read it again anyway or just see the movie?  I know I would have to fence in more property to do that properly (ooh, alliteration!), and we seem to be spending all our excess cash on my Mountaineer--fixing the door, getting a stereo, tune up, new tires.  It's nice Ronny wants me to be safe since he's away so often, but I really would like to spend the money in areas I want to spend the money in.  Fencing, feed, fuel for gallivanting....The car may be safe but I can't go anywhere fun because I don't have enough gas....Bummer and a half.

How does the Serenity Prayer go?  God, grant me the serenity to change the things I can, Courage to accept the things I can't and Wisdom to know the difference.  

If I had written that it would be a little different:  God, let me change all the things I want to without anybody stopping me.  That's not unreasonable, is it?  

Prepared for Emergencies Part 2

As I write this, just understand I'm not writing from a survivalist standpoint, only from the standpoint of being prepared.  For example, do you have enough food in your house for at least three days?  I always used to think this was a silly question because I always have at least a weeks supply, but I now understand not everyone does.  This would be a good starting point then. Additionally, if you do not have your own clean water source on your property you would do well to have several gallons of water on hand for drinking, etc.  I would also encourage the use of a rain barrel or two.  This water could be used for flushing toilets in lieu of fresh water.  In your home, do you have either an alternate heat source or enough blankets to keep you warm without heat?  Do you have an alternate source of lighting, such as I described yesterday?  While candles are an easy go-to, they can be dangerous.  The hurricane lamp would be one way to make them less risky.

Three days is the classic time frame given in emergency planning.  This is because help can usually be found or the situation improved or even resolved in that time frame.  If your situation is such that you feel help would not be available or accessible in that time frame, be prepared for that.  Having coolers on hand, for example, to keep food cold when the refrigerator or freezer are not functioning.  If you are super-serious about needing to have some power, then a generator is your best bet, but make sure to have fuel on hand at all times.  You can't leave in  a blizzard to get fuel; you've got to have it there.

Going back to the discussion of a bug out bag:  Whatever you decide to put in it, you should have one in your car at all times.  You should have one in your house which can just be grabbed should you need to evacuate.  And I stress, this bag is just for a limited use.  I am not talking "I had to leave my house to go live in the woods, so what do I need?"  The assumption is that you are going TO somewhere else.  You are going to a relative's or a friend's house, to a motel out of the danger zone, etc.  If your scenario is a 'survive in the woods' scenario then you either need to have more on hand or you need to know how to survive like Survivor Man or MacGyver. 

In summary: 

Do you have at least three days supply of food/essentials in your home?  Do you have adequate means to keep yourself from freezing? 

Do you have a bug out bag in case of evacuation?  Look at it as a glorified overnight back.  Essentials only. 

Do you have somewhere to Go in case of an emergency?  It might be time to look up distant relatives if you can't come up with anyone.  Or old high school friends.  Remember that kid with the wart on his thumb from kindergarten?  Give him a call and see if  he's willing to put you up for a few days.  Also, as I was reminded, do your family members know what your plans are so that they can meet up with you or contact you? 

I know I'm forgetting a lot.  I don't claim to be an expert, I'm just someone trying not to be caught unprepared.  For more complete information, visit FEMA for a disaster kit list.  Amazon.com is a great resource for mylar blankets, solar lamps, emergency radios, and even complete emergency kits.  Just click on the links in this post and you will be taken to the underlined item. 

Hopefully we've all been given some food for thought and some ideas for planning purposes.  I know it's been helpful to me just to do the bit of research I've done for these last two posts.  Keep safe, people.  It's a dangerous world out there and sometimes it comes too close to home.  

Prepared for Emergencies

As I found out on the last day of the month, September was National Preparedness Month.  I suppose in honor of September 2001 since the motto was "A Time to Remember.  A Time to Prepare."  I have admitted that I was woefully unprepared since the whole month passed me by unawares.  Always one to procrastinate, but never one to be left behind, I have decided that October will be I'm Getting Ready Month. 

I have ordered and received two items I consider to be Essential for True Emergencies. 

Charging my Solar Lantern.  The white crescent in the front is the On/Off switch.  There is a handle attached for either carrying or hanging.  I charged it all day today and brought it in for testing tonight.  

This picture was taken in the light of the Solar Lantern.  You will notice the brand, d.light.  http://onemillionlights.org/Africa/donate is one place you can buy the light and simultaneously make a donation which helps to provide solar lamps to the poor in Africa who otherwise often rely on kerosene. 

This is a hand-cranked/Solar Emergency Radio with a USB Cell Phone Charger.  I think this is brilliant.  Cell phones can be invaluable in an emergency, but what to do with a low battery when there is no power?  This device solves the problem magnificently.  It is also quite compact, making it easy to pack in a bug-out bag or store in the glove box of a vehicle.  

I'm planning my bug-out bags next.  So far I have three requirements for them:
1.  Everybody will have and carry their own.  This means they must be lightweight and comfortable. 

2.  The bags do not have to be identical in content, although this is tempting.  By allowing for individualized content each person's needs will be factored in, and the more they feel the bag fills their needs the more likely they are to be protective of and responsible for the bag.  This does not mean that each bag should not have essentials.  First aid kit, mylar blanket or sleeping bag*, protein bars, water.  I cannot imagine not having these in each bag. 
    
3.  The bags should truly be for bugging out.  What is ESSENTIAL?  This may differ from family to family, from person to person.  Do you have medication that is VITAL?  You should store one 'pack' of these VITAL medications in your compact first aid kit.  You may need to rotate it out every few months, but you will be glad you took care of this detail in advance should the need ever arise to leave without a moment's hesitation.   
     
Even as I am writing I am getting more clear on how I should stock these bags.  Although I am still in the planning stage I am making strides each week toward assembling three bug out bags.  By the end of the month I should have them complete.  Proverbs 22:3 is a motivating force:  "Shrewd is the one that has seen the calamity and proceeds to conceal himself, but the inexperienced have passed along and must suffer the penalty."

Do you have a bug out bag?  What do you have in yours?  

* These come in packs of four or more.  It may be tempting to put an unopened pack in one bag, but it may be wiser to put one blanket in each bag.  What if you should become separated? 

The Adventures of Runty, Guinea Extraordinaire, Part 1

"I'm not getting left behind this time, guys!"

Guinea For Your Thoughts

No, they're not vultures.  I swear.

I love the guineas.  I hate the guineas.  It depends on what they are doing at the moment.  If they are running around chasing all my chickens I hate them.  If they are doing crazy guinea things I love them.  I'm very inconsistent.  It was good that a friend reminded me today that they are just establishing their place in the pecking order of the barnyard.  That, of course, would be that they are Top Poultry.  This is a shock to the Squatter Twins and Squeaky as they had occupied this place formerly.  And the little runty chicks have no standing whatsoever, so I just keep them locked up out of Guinea's Way.  Until it's night and then the guineas miraculously change their tune and want to snuggle with the chicks.  I think it's some sort of Domestic Abuse situation:  "I promise I'll change.  I'll never do it again"  and then the next thing you know the chicks are all squashed in one corner peeping up a storm.  *sigh*

The little chicks are in the other corner, doing the exact same thing.  Just wait til I leave.

 On a much lighter note, I was in and out of the house all day today, and on one of these 'out' occasions the guineas flew over the fence and into the woods.  Except for one.  One poor guinea left in the chicken yard to watch its companions roam around the woods.  I went out once to try to corral the guineas but I might as well have tried to catch the wind in a net.  As the sun started to go down, however, the guineas experienced remorse for all their wicked behavior and made a ruckus on the Out Side of the fence.  "We want to go home, but we're too evil to fly back inside the fence!"  So, I called to them in their native tongue:  "Guinea, guinea, guinea, guinea, guinea!"  For some reason, they recognize this as some sort of call to attention and they all looked at me.  I continued:  "Buck wheat!  Buck wheat!"  They all began  to follow me around the house.  I opened the gate for them and they flew over the empty space at exactly the right height to have gone over an unopened gate.  *shaking my head* "Guineas." 

Their poor companion, who they had left alone in the yard all day, was ecstatic, running along the fence line to join them.  The escapee fowl flew into the rabbit pen, then over that fence into the chicken yard.  "We could have done it all the time!"  they laughed.  I know, guineas.  You just like to pretend you are stupid.  You do a good job.  I love you anyway.  Except for the times I want to eat you. 

Chloe says "If you'll just let me at 'em I'll make them mind!"

High Point of the Day

Guineas on the roof of the coop

Guinea, Guinea, Guinea, Guinea, Guinea, Crookneck!

This morning I looked out at the chicken coop and saw one of the hens outside.  All the other hens were still locked up from the night before, so this one had somehow managed to elude cooping.  She had her head deeply bowed and was not moving.  I actually thought she was dead.  When I approached she moved, slowly backing away.  "What in the world?"  I wondered.  Quick conclusions:  She has a broken neck.

It's hard to tell from this angle, but she really can't raise her head.

I, um, tried a splint but it looked too silly for me to take it seriously.  So, after a good laugh, I removed it.

Now, after I gathered this little girl up and put her in a tub inside, I did some internet research rather rapidly and changed my conclusion.  She had injured, maybe even strained her neck in either an attempt to gain entry to the coop after it was closed or an attack from some predator that she managed to outwit.  I gave her some wet cat food and some water and covered the tub up so she could rest and recover.

After a morning Bible study with Craig, we went over to Providence Farm in Phenix, the home of Mrs. G and Nutmeg the goat, among many other forms of livestock.  I had taken her up on her offer to remove the guineas from off the farm.  It appears she hates them.  She thinks them Evil and was tremendously relieved when I captured them in the coop, stuffed them in a crate, and took them not only from her presence but from the county even!

I took them home and released them from the crate into the chicken yard.  They remained there for exactly ten minutes before escaping over the fence into the garden.  I was not concerned since that's part of the reason I have them:  insect control.  Glad to see them settling in and making themselves at home, I went back in the house to check on the "injured" bird.

Beauty is in the Eye of the Beholder.  But don't they look glorious?

 She seemed much the same, perhaps her head was not so deeply bowed.  I went back online and did more thorough research, coming to the revised-revised conclusion that she had what is variously called 'limpneck', 'wryneck' or 'crookneck'.  The causes are thought to vary from brain damage originating in injury or infection, a virus, or vitamin deficiency.  None of my other birds are showing similar symptoms so it is difficult for me to say what caused it.  I settled on a course of treatment easily available to me:  Vitamin E capsule squeezed into the beak and a dropperful of Colloidal Silver.  I followed this with several droppers of water and then left her to rest again.  (Getting a chicken to cooperate with you while dosing them with 'medication' is like getting a toddler to open their mouth for medicine.  Scoodles of fun.)

It's coming around to 5 PM now and my husband is due home from three days on the road.  I hope he doesn't mind a chicken in the bathroom and guineas in the garden.

UPDATE:  After two days of treatment with the Vitamin E and Colloidal Silver, the hen with crookneck was able to walk frontwards again.  She was alert, her head held high, able to eat and drink normally.  I released her into the coop again at night, which always makes a transition easier.